Wednesday, October 04, 2017

It's been a rough couple of days with the pain yo yo.   Sleepless nights, increase in pain, maybe due to the  stormfront that moved in.  A friend of mine suggested to try to track what I do, eat, sleep, etc. to see if there's some kind of correlation.  I want to do that in my moments of lucidity.  I'm going to try. 

Now, I'm experiencing another kind of pain.  I called my dad today.  He and his wife have been moved to a care facility in Salina.  I know things are going not-well there.  It makes it bad for me because I can't visit them.  Driving across town is about all I can handle, let alone a two-and-a-half hour drive. 

So, I call.  And today was the day I've been dreading.  I have become used to calling and having the same conversation with my dad.  I just acted like it was the first time and responded like it was our first time of talking about this or that.  Today, I don't think my dad knew who he was talking to.  We were barely on the phone for two minutes when he said, "Thanks for calling, goodbye," and hung up.

I choked up.  It felt like I'd been dealt a physical blow.  Alzheimer's is a terrible thing.

My dad Wayne, cousin Neillie, cousin Judy, Twila Dad's wife Taken Sept 29, 2017

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